Wow! It’s been a while since I’ve written anything. I have been in this depressive funk. I can’t seem to find any joy in my life. I know I have kids and a husband who love me but when you really come down to it, that is it. I’ve started therapy again, so don’t worry I know what I’m feeling is fucked up but it is what it is. This year I’ve had two friends just drop me. I would understand if I did something wrong but they can’t or won’t give me a reason for cutting me out of their lives. So, I am stuck wondering what I did to make them hate me. How can you change something if no one tells you what you need to change? I have just lost all faith in humanity. I will stick to the internet and animals. I can’t describe how empty I feel inside. My therapist wants me to come up with three positive things I like about myself. It’s harder than it seems. This is all I have been able to come up with; I’m honest, trustworthy and loyal. I look at that and that is all I want in a friend and I’ve never been able to find it.